In which we question the writing industry...

[jesshartley]

Even as a neo-pro, I know there are certain things I hear over and over from fans and readers. Things I wish someone had told readers that writers hate to hear. Things like “I have this great idea! You should write it and we could split the profits!” or the ever popular “Yeah, I’m going to write this great novel, I just haven’t had time yet.”

I know they’re well meaning, and no one wants to be rude to an obviously enthusiastic person. They certainly don’t intend to utter those phrases that make us want to run screaming back into the solitude of our offices and writing caves, but utter them they do, and scream we’d love to. I’ve often wished there was some way the information could get spread around painlessly, kind of a non-targeted “This is what you said. This is why their eyes glazed over.”

To this end, I’m running a panel at Arisia in Boston next month entitled “Literature Geek Speak: What NOT to say to your favorite writer.” It’s designed as a one-hour casual setting panel on “You’ve finally got a chance to meet them face to face. What to say after “Hi, I love your work!”

For those of you who are published, or who work in the industry, I’m wondering if there’s anything that sticks out in your mind as “the thing I hate to hear”. I’m planning on including the “split the profits” bit as well as the “haven’t had time” thing. If you had anything else, I’d love to include it.

Comments

[pamc.livejournal.com]

This is an awesome idea... although I always was a corporate writer, so I'm not sure I have any input.

[phantomoftruth.livejournal.com]

The wrong question to ask,

Is any question posed to Larry Niven when on a panel or in a Q&A session.

[non-sanctus.livejournal.com]

You know, it has never happened, but I have always told myself that if I ever end up seeing an artist of some sort (actor, painter, musician, writer, etc.) that has some degree of fame and is one that I have respect for, with the exception of a select few, I wouldn't bother approaching them. Outside of the one line of "Hi. I just wanted to let you know that there is someone out there that really appreciates your work" I would really have nothing else to say to them. That one line being reserved for the before mentioned exceptions.

The uber exception being David Fincher. I would not be able to stop from humping his leg.

[ldragoon.livejournal.com]

I don't know if you want only writing comments, but female comic artists get some DOOZIES. Like, "Can you draw me a picture of (your character) butt naked? Please??". Or, "I like your story -- but your girl character's tits aren't big enough".

[lucien-soulban.livejournal.com]

Hm. I'd say:
"When to recognize the difference between an author's mistake and an author's choice."
Saying "I don't like this character" or "I don't like this idea" doesn't make it a bad idea or bad character. It was a choice you didn't agree with, and saying it was wrong is as bad as saying people who don't share my opinion aren't entitled to one.

Well

[(Anonymous)]

The night before I left for VA, a friend came over and was freaked out by the idea (he doesn't read) that our stories are about bad things such as vampires and werewoofs. I tried to get across to him that conflict is what the vast majority of fiction is about. No dice. So to speak.*

To people who claim "I could write as well as Jess/Hemingway/Sartre/Sade," the kind reply is "Please do" (they never do); the unkind reply is "But you don't."

I love dealing with fans, few of them as I've ever had ("the hero of canton"). Philippe absolutely did not get it, when he joked about me holding court. The point of talking to fans is to get them to buy more WW products.
Being nice is a big motive also.
Off to see Civil War battlefields.








*This is not to be taken as an endorsement of diceless roleplaying. However, I do enjoy such.

[lilithsaintcrow.livejournal.com]

I have a whole list, but I will only suggest one question that is extremely rude and that I hate being asked.

"Can you recommend me to your agent?"

I get asked this a lot. Believe me, if you're good, I will recommend you. If I like you and I read your stuff and it's not agent-worthy, I will gently suggest things to make it better. But I will not pass any old crap on to my agent, nor should I. anything I pass along implicitly reflects on me, and it is rude for someone to imply that I should be a pipeline for them, especially when I don't know them from Adam. In my humble opinion, if a fellow writer offers to pass along your work, it is a great compliment. If they don't, don't ask.

This is a faux pas I see frequently, and I'm sure my stance may strike some as harsh. But if I could pick one thing to never have anyone ask me again, that would be it. Please note that it's OK to ask, "How did you get your agent?" and "Who is your agent?" and "How do you recommend going about getting an agent?" But it is, I repeat, not OK to ask, "Can you give this to your agent?", especially if I don't know you from Adam.

Whoo, I ranted there. I'm sure I can come up with a list of don'ts, but I'm not sure my blood pressure could take it. :) Miss Snark might be a good person to ask about this too...

[jesshartley.livejournal.com]

No rant at all. That's really the kind of thing folks need to know, not only what's not okay, but what is, and you handled it well. :)

[lilithsaintcrow.livejournal.com]

:) Thanks, sweetie.

I think both the "I've got this idea, let's split the profit" and the "I've always wanted to write a novel when I have time" spring from a perception of the writer as a dissolute layabout who has plenty of time to whore and drink between dashing off squiggles.If people could grasp the fact--that writing is a professional career on par with, say, an IT tech or a freelance engineering consultant--that they woudln't say those sorts of things.

Which beings me to another point: the persistent devaluing of the artist in our society. I highly recommend Julia Cameron's The Artist's Way for writers suffering from this kind of stuff. :)

Jeez, I just can't shut up today, can I? argh.

[jesshartley.livejournal.com]

Damn it, I'm getting a decided lack of drinking and whoring between squiggle-dashing!

[lilithsaintcrow.livejournal.com]

You and me both, darling. you and me both.

A protocol question...and outsider comment

[arvanna.livejournal.com]

..do people in general dislike being asked about what they're working on
or details about it or does that vary from author to author?

Input: seems to me it would be colossally rude for someone to ask what kind of work an author is working on and then loftily proclaim, "Oh, I never read THAT [insert genre here]!" I don't write so I haven't been the target of those remarks but
have heard them directed at *other* writer friends from time to time.(Not you) Think it sucks.

This may not be of use but ...

[mamishka.livejournal.com]

I got to watch Bruce Campbell the other day with his fans for several hours. What really impressed me about him was that he wanted to connect with them. Each person he met, he would shake their hand, ask them what their name was, and then ask them what it was that they do. He showed an interest in them and not only was that, IMHO, wonderful and utterly unique for a pro to do, writer and actor really, but it eliminated a lot of the flustered "what do I SAY??!!" for the fan. It gave them an easy way to interact with someone that they really are fannish over.

Anywho, I realize that him being primarily an actor makes that different in many ways, but I think in the end what is going on is that people want to make a connection, and for a lot of them they probably figure the only way to do that is to talk about something that they do and know that you do - writing. Perhaps if you give them another option, they will be less annoying and more interesting? Just a thought. :)